raisegoodkids

I received these kiddo stories in an email forward and they gave me a little chuckle this morning. I thought I’d share them and brighten your day also.

1.) On nudity: A mother was driving with her three children one warm summer evening when a  woman in a convertible ahead of them stood up and waved. She was naked! In response to what they had just seen, the five year old shouted from the back seat, “Mom, that lady isn’t wearing a seat belt.”

2.) On opinions: On the first day of school, a first grader handed his teacher a note from his mother. The note read, “The opinions expressed by this child are not necessarily those of his parents.”

3.) On ketchup: A woman was trying hard to get the ketchup out of the jar. During her struggle the phone rang, so she asked her 4 year old to answer the phone. “Mommy can’t come to the phone right now. She’s hitting the bottle.”

4.) On nudity, again: A little boy got lost at a fitness center and found himself in the women’s locker room. Upon being spotted, the room burst into shrieks and ladies were grabbing towels and running for cover. The little boy watched in amazement and then asked, “What’s the matter? Haven’t you ever seen a little boy before?”

5.) On police: While taking a routine vandalism report at an elementary school, a police officer was interrupted by a little kindergarten student. She looked the police officer up and down and asked, “Are you a cop?” The police officer answered ‘yes’ and then continued to write his report. The little girl continued, “My mother said that if I ever need help I should ask a police officer. Is that right?” Again the police officer answered ‘yes’. She replied, “Well, then would you please tie my shoe?”

6.) On police, again: At the end of the day a police officer parked his police van and was gathering equipment. His K-9 partner was barking in the van and the police officer noticed a little boy staring at him. “Is that a dog you got back there?” The police officer answered, “It sure is.” The boy looked puzzled as he looked at the police officer and then back at the van. After a few minutes he asked, “What did he do?”

7.) On elderly: A woman brought her 4 her old with her while she was delivering lunches to the elderly. The little girl was very interested in the various equipment she saw and particularly the canes, walkers, and wheelchairs. One day the little girl was found staring at a pair of false teeth soaking in a glass. The woman braced herself for what her daughter may say, but she simply turned to her mother and whispered, “The toothfairy will never believe this!”

8.) On dressing up: A little girl watched her parents dress for a party. When she saw her dad in his tuxedo she seriously warned him, “Daddy, you shouldn’t wear that.” The father questioned why he wouldn’t want to wear his tux and the little girl responded, “You know that it always gives you a headache the next morning.”

9.) On death: A group a 5 year old boys found a dead robin. They felt that a proper burial should be performed, so they found a small box and some cotton batting. The boys dug a small hole and became ready for the disposal of the deceased bird. One little boy was chosen to say a prayer. The little boy, with such dignity in his voice sang out ”Glory be unto the Faaather, and unto the Sonnn, and into the hole he goooes.”

10.) On school: A little girl had just finished her first week of school. “I’m just wasting my time.” she said to her parents, “I can’t read, I can’t write, and they won’t let me talk.”

11.) On the Bible: A little boy opened the family Bible. He was fascinated as he looked through the pages when suddenly something fell out of the book. He picked up the object and looked at it. It was an old leaf that had been pressed between the pages. The little boy called out, “Mom, look what I found.” The mother asked what he had found and the little boy answered with amazement, “I think it’s Adam’s underwear.”

 Like I said, these little stories gave me a good laugh this morning. I hope you enjoyed reading them also. You can never be too surprised by what comes out of the mouths of babes!

I was talking to fellow parent of a toddler this weekend and she stated that she was thinking of starting the transition to potty training her son. Upon thinking of something to write about today, I came across some tips to successful potty training. I thought I’d do a follow-up on potty training ideas, as this is one of the biggies when it comes to having a 2-3 year old.

One of the first things you need to make sure of is that your child is ready, not just kind of ready, but really ready. They should be showing an interest in the bathroom and watching others go potty. They should be able to tell you or indicate when he has to go or when he has just went. He shouldn’t show any tolerance to having a dirty diaper.

Here are some other tips to making the transition a little bit easier:

1.) Give your child lots of praise and attention, lots of positive reinforcement, love and affection, and show pride in your child. Make a genuine big deal out of every attempt and success made by your child.

2.) Try bribes, give a few M&Ms each time your child goes.

3.) Target practice with cheerios when your child is learning to pee standing up. I wouldn’t recommend starting this until your child has enough balance and coordination to stand elevated on a stool and then concentrate on aiming into the toilet. That is, unless you enjoy mopping up pee and having your bathroom smell like urine.

4.) Put stickers on a sticker chart every time your child goes potty. This will give your child the chance to really see the success they are having and to show off all the stickers they have earned.

5.) Buy the big boy underwear and just go “cold turkey”. Don’t forget to protect your furniture. I made my son sit on a nice thick blanket folded up several times whenever he got on the couch.

6.) Put your child on the potty frequently. Every 20 minutes is a good place to start until you get a better idea of how often your child actually needs to go. However, do not force your child to go to the potty if he doesn’t want to. The last thing you want is for him to resent the potty and for the bathroom to end up as a battle zone.

7.) Keep your child in just underwear at first. This makes it easier to go independently.

8.) Patience and persistence on your part. You can’t give up the first time your child has an accident.

9.) Put the potty seat where your child spends most of his time. Seeing the potty seat should remind him to go more often.

10.) Travel with a potty seat. Many children are scared of public and unfamiliar toilets and having a potty seat with you will just be more convenient and less stressful for you.

There were several other tips that I found, but these ten were one’s I had actually used when potty training Sam. They worked for us and hopefully they will work for you also! Good luck!

So, I was out and about on the town last night. No, not really, but I was sitting in a church rectory learning to knit. A far cry from those wild and crazy nights of many years ago, but still a welcome relief. It’s amazing how just a few hours out of the house and away from the kids can completely rejuvenate you!

I started the evening with excitement. I like to learn and try new things. I had tried to learn to crochet before, but was unsuccessful. I could crochet single rows, but when it came time to connect rows they never added up. I would have been a wonderful maker of crocheted triangles! Upon arriving at the church, I discovered that there were quite a few ladies embarking on this new adventure and only one teacher. Oh, no!! Leave it to super MB to somewhat successfully teach us to knit. I watched and listened, she had a poem that talked about jumping Jack off. This poem was supposed to teach us the pattern of the knit stitch, but really just left us all laughing and wishing that we had some Jack to drink!

For the first hour, I successfully knitted - or rather knotted - my yarn. I couldn’t figure out what I was doing wrong. I was going in the front door, out the window, and I was jumping Jack off. I was following the simple directions from the poem, but the more I jumped Jack off the more my work of art resembled a mess! Frustration was mounting. What was I doing wrong? Well, super MB swooped in and I soon discovered that I was not going in the front door like the poem instructed, but rather I was entering through a small side door. Ahh, haa! Now that the problem is solved, let’s try again. The knotted mess is gone, I’m entering through the front door and I’m jumping Jack off, and …. it looks right, let’s try again. I’m doing it, I’m really doing it!!

By the end of the second hour, I had a few rows done. Knitting was going smoothly now. So, I ask, what exactly are we making? MB shakes her head and shrugs her shoulders. Oh, nothing. Well, I declare that I am making a square and I will call my square a spoon rest. Now, I have a goal. I am now making a nice white knitted spoon rest!

As I was going home, fear set in that I would fall asleep and wake up with no recollection of where the front door is and what if Jack just won’t jump off. I have sweet dreams of knitting and making beautiful creations. I wake up and after feeding the baby and slicing a banana for the older one, I knit one row, just to make sure I remember how to do it. It works! I will soon have a spoon rest I can call my very own!

I am now looking forward to my (hopefully) weekly evening at the church rectory. I am looking forward to more jokes about Jack and most importantly, I am looking forward to adult conversation, a few hours of friendship, and the relaxed feeling that comes from being out of the house and away from the kids.

A child’s self-esteem begins to develop around 2 years of age when he becomes aware of right and wrong and how things should be done. By preschool, he will show satisfaction when he does something good, but he will also show shame or disappointment when he does something wrong.

A parenting style which sets firm limits, but is also accepting, supporting, and respectful of a child’s individuality leads to the highest self-esteem. Firm limits are important to set realistic goals and social comparisons. A willingness to reason with your child allows him to explore his point of view and parental support enhances his sense of importance.

Here are some ways to help build your child’s self-esteem:

1.) avoid labeling as “good” or “bad”

2.) treat him as an individual and avoid comparing with others

3.) give your child encouragement for all of his efforts

4.) give him responsibility that is appropriate for his age

5.) provide examples of self-respect

6.) talk to your child and show a genuine interest in what he is doing

7.) praise your child for trying new things even if your child was not successful; encourage risk-taking

8.) allow your child to speak for himself

9.) avoid criticizing your child’s mistakes

10.) don’t rush your child

Also, don’t forget to teach your child the skills he will need to solve his own problems. You can help your child find solutions to a problem by asking him how he thinks he could solve the problem. If your child is having a hard time coming up with a solution, you could suggest two or three possibilities and then allow him to choose one. The best solution to a problem is one that actually solves the problem, but is also the one that makes your child feel good about himself.

I believe that everyone knows that infants and children learn skills through practice, imitation and modeling. A parent can teach a child many things without the parent even realizing it. That’s a scary thought, how many times have we done something embarrassing or said something without thinking about who was listening? I have to say, I have a problem with the word “crap” and Sam has picked up on that a few times already. Little ears have very good hearing, he can hear me say that word three rooms away and when Max is crying! Not exactly a positive way to promote communication skills, but here are some good ideas!

 Birth - 2 years

* encourage and imitate sounds like ma-ma, ba-ba, da-da

* imitate baby laughing and facial expressions that go with various feelings

* make eye contact when you’re talking to your baby

* teach baby to imitate actions like clapping hands, blow kisses, and peek-a-boo

* talk to your baby & toddler all the time, talk to them about what you are doing when you give them a bath or change their clothes

* label colors and objects and count for your children during play

* use gestures, like waving, while saying bye-bye

* introduce animal sounds

* read to your baby and toddler

2-4 years

* model good speech

* repeat what your child has said so they can hear the proper way to form sentences and make sounds

* talk about books, pictures in books, categorize items (like all things you can eat), count items in books

* help to understand questions by playing the yes/no game - ask your child simple questions like “Are you a boy?” and give them the chance to answer appropriately; also, ask your child questions which require a choice “Do you want a banana or graham cracker for snack?”

* expand your child’s vocabulary by naming everything you see and give a short description of the object - “This is my nose. I use it to smell. I can smell flowers and cookies.”

* sing and teach rhymes to your children

* place objects and toys into a container, remove one object at a time, name it and tell one thing about it

* use photographs of familiar people or places to encourage conversation

4-6 years

* give and get attention when speaking

* teach spatial relationships (first, middle, last) and opposites

* play guessing games like I Spy - describe an object and have your child guess what you are talking about

* what doesn’t belong in set categories

* introduce 2 and 3 step directives

* continue to describe and talk about everything you do and see

The more you use these techniques the easier they will become to incorporate them into your daily routine. I probably sound like a broken record some of the time. Whenever Sam hands me something I’m always saying something like, “You gave me a spoon. I will eat cereal with it.” Then again, he does know what most objects are and what they are used for and he’s learned his first curse word. What more can a mother ask for, right?

We have three dogs and my kids love them. My oldest helps feed and water them and he loves walking around the backyard and playing with them. “Come on, Jack.” he’ll say as they go exploring. The baby just likes to watch them in complete wonder and amazement. You can almost read his mind as he watches them run past him, “What in the world is that thing? Why does it lick my face?”

A child with a pet can learn to care for it, treat it kindly, and to be patient with it. These are all tools in learning how to treat people, also. Taking care of a pet can assist in developing positive feelings and can contribute to a child’s self-esteem and self-confidence. Having a positive relationship with a pet can teach a child to also have positive and trusting relationships with others. The pet/child relationship can help in developing non-verbal communication, compassion, and empathy. A child can learn a lot about nature, life-care and responsibility, and lessons dealing with birth, death, and illness. A pet can be a companion, can give a child someone to talk to, and can provide comfort, love, loyalty, and affection. A pet will give a child the chance to grow physically and can provide a lot of activity and fun. Most importantly, having a pet can help your children to grow into mature and responsible adults.

If you don’t have a pet, consider getting one. You will need to asses your home, family, and lifestyle to determine what kind of pet would be best for you. Take a trip to a local animal shelter and allow your child to play with different animals to see which one might make the perfect fit. Sam had been talking about wanting a kitty cat for several months, but he had never really been around a real cat. So, we took him to a local adopt-a-thon and let him see a real cat. We gave him the opportunity to pet the cats and to hold them. By doing this, we discovered that he really did not seem to have much interest in them after all. He still talks about the kitty cats, but we don’t think he’s quite ready to pursue that adventure just yet. Maybe he did not have any interest in the cats at this adopt-a-thon because none of them were orange. We found that while we surfed the internet looking at various cats in shelters he always picked out the orange ones as his favorites. So, maybe we will try again at the shelter and see how he likes an orange kitty cat! Things like that is why I sometimes call him “my little weirdo”!

After yesterday, I realized just how much I love being home with my children. The world is a very ugly place and there are some very rude and ugly people in it, but here at my home, I have a happy little corner of the world. I can control, for the most part, what my children are exposed to. I can teach them happiness, gratitude, and respect. It’s funny to think that a two year old can show more of these attributes and bring more of these traits into the world than some adults can. My feelings were hurt yesterday and my son knew that. Walking out of a building that I had spent so many years in and fighting back tears is hard to hide from an inquisitive toddler. “What wrong, mom-mom?” What do you say? Do you tell him the truth or just glaze over the details a little? My response was, “Nothing, baby, mom-mom is just a little sad. We will go play with kids and I will feel better.” “Okay, mom-mom.” was his response as he held my hand so tightly. The truth being that I was not fine. People have made me feel invaluable and unwanted before, this is nothing new - in grade school, the mean girls would pick on me; in high school, my boyfriend wouldn’t call when he said he would; in college, I would be taken advantage of because I got good grades and actually studied. The difference is this, never before have I felt this way and had to explain it to my children. I feel that my son received a very tarnished picture of the world yesterday and a bit of his innocence was taken away. He saw that not every person he encounters in his life is going to be nice and pleasant and compliment him on something. Where do I go from here? I need to continue to encourage that he grows up with values and morals and try to teach him not to judge people by the way they make you feel or the way they may act. No one is perfect, everyone has some little things that they need to work on. I will continue to build my happy little corner of the world. I will hope and pray that my children continue to show the positive and uplifting traits that only the very best of people have. I will continue to teach them the simple rules of life “Love your neighbor as yourself” and “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you”.

Have you ever been treated with such disrespect that you were actually left in shock? That’s what happened to me today.

I started the morning off so happy because I was taking my son to a playdate sponsored by our local school district. It’s always wonderful to get out of the house. We left a little early because I had scheduled a meeting with another staff member at the school to go over some research for an article I am writing. Apparently I left a little too much time because we ended up with about 20 minutes between the meeting’s end and the start of the playdate. So, I asked the office secretary if we could go down to a friends classroom and say “hi” really fast. Oh, did I mention that I worked at this place for four years before I quit to stay home with my children? She called the classroom to make sure it was okay and after getting approval from the teacher, we headed down the hallway. During our short visit, my son started doing his pee-pee dance (he’s recently potty trained and still doesn’t like the big public toilets), one of the teachers told me to go down the hall to another classroom because they have a potty seat. I should have known that because it was my old classroom and I bought the freakin’ thing!! So, anyways, I take my son to the bathroom, and upon coming out the school’s principal is standing there and says to me, “I need to see you in the hall.” Note the tone in front of my young son. So, we go in the hallway and he proceeds to tell me that I don’t need to be there and blah-blah-blah. Just like he did when I worked there, he never listened to what I was saying. I tried to tell him that I had a meeting and we had some extra time and that I had gotten permission with the office secretary to come down there. His response, after repeating myself several times, was this, “Well, you must have been misinformed.” I’ll give you misinformed, to think that I really care what you say or think. This man is one of the biggest reasons why I am not teaching there anymore. I would not work with someone who was so disrespectful to me, other staff members, and not to mention, students. I will not even send my children to school there and already have them on a waiting list for a private preschool for the year 2010-2011. This man is an arrogant and self-absorbed SOB. He didn’t like the fact that came into his building under a newly formed position and started to point out things that needed to change and told him that he was actually doing things illegally when it came to special education and behavior management things. He had this mind-set that special education and preschool was not his problem and someone else needed to take care of it. He didn’t like it when I told him that the preschool didn’t have to be there, it is not currently mandated by the state education department, but the preschool special education students and myself would be there no matter if there was a preschool or not. He didn’t like being told by a young dumb-blonde girl that he basically needed to just deal with the fact that we were there and there was nothing he could really do about it. Now, after quitting work there almost 2 years ago, I stop in to take my child to an event and say “hi” to some former colleagues and I’m treated like some damn annoying rash that you just can’t get rid of. I told my husband that I was so mad I could sh@* bullets!! Anyways, this was just one of the few mommy anger moments I have experienced and I just needed to vent a little bit. Writing is a good way to express feelings and I feel much better now!!

Let’s all try to raise happy and healthy kids.  Here are ten ways to do just that.

1.) Give praise

Throughout the day give your child specific praise, not just a simple “good job”, but acknowledge the specific behavior which warranted the good job. Give your child positive feedback. Don’t forget to observe and acknowledge good behaviors on the spot. It’s always wonderful to “catch” good behaviors as they happen.

2.) Raise grateful kids

You must teach your children responsibility. You can do this by finding ways to help others and by talking about what it means to be a good person. Teach your children values and explain that you and others will feel better when you are nice, honest, and respectful.

3.) Say “I love you”

Three little words can mean so much, so say it often and love all the little moments you have with your family.

4.) Set limits

Don’t deny your children the chance to explore, but set boundaries so they can do it safely. Give them responsibilities, they are good for self-esteem and with developing independence. Allow your children to make some mistakes and to find their own solutions to problems and different ways to do things.

5.) Have dinner

Research has shown the eating dinner as a family is a good time to connect with each other and also helps to develop healthy eating habits.

6.) Teach social skills

Try to ask your children at least three “you” questions everyday. These questions will help to teach your child the art of conversation. Also, it is very important to make eye contact with the people you are speaking with. Tell your children to try to notice the color of a person’s eyes in order to establish good eye contact. Don’t forget to acknowledge your child’s emotions. They may have a temper tantrum, but try to acknowledge what they are feeling and talk about it.

7.) Make quality time

Play with your kids, follow their lead and do what they want to do, allow for no interruptions. Set up a daily reading time, bedtime stories are good for this. Give your children “daddy time”. Research also shows that kids with active fathers do better in school, problem-solve better, and have better coping skills. Make memories for your children by establishing family rituals.

8.) Brain power and physical activity

Try teaching your baby sign language. Don’t forget to provide your children with lots of physical activity. Research shows that brain development in young children may be linked to their activity level.

9.) Be a role model

Always model appropriate, respectful, and good behavior. Apologize to your children if you overreact to something and allow your children to witness your apologies to others. Care for the environment. Teach your children the importance of recycling and cleaning up trash outdoors. Show affection to your spouse and respect parenting differences. Do not criticize or argue in front of your children.

10.) Don’t forget these important healthcare needs

- vaccinations

- brush your child’s teeth twice a day

- keep your children safe by baby-proofing your home and always use car seats & seat belts

- apply sunscreen everytime you go outdoors

Following these simple 10 steps will help to raise happy and healthy children.

“Don’t touch that.” It would be interesting to know exactly how many times throughout a single day I say that little three word phrase.

Sam wants to help with everything. He wants to help cook, clean, feed Baby Max, and much more. The problem is this: his kind of help isn’t always my kind of help. It isn’t really help when he wants to stir the eggs and spills sticky and runny eggs all over the counter. It isn’t really help when he “sweeps” up my dirt pile, but ends up scattering the dirt all over the floor again. And it isn’t really help when he wants to feed Baby Max and ends up eating the food himself. Now, don’t get me wrong, I appreciate the effort and interest he puts into wanting to help me. However, I do not appreciate the extra work that his kind of help usually causes me to have!

Sam, like most toddlers, is very curious and eager to learn. He wants to touch everything so that he knows how it works. He experiments with objects and manipulates materials just to learn a little bit more about his world. All of this “help” and exploring is really just encouraging him to develop physically, emotionally, and intellectually.

I need to limit using those three little words to only the times when his safety and health could be affected. I need to make sure that I am allowing him enough time for safe exploration and set appropriate limits for him. Our home is already pretty child-friendly. Sam knows to keep his hands off of my “pretty’s” and he has plenty of toys in all parts of the house that he is allowed to play with. Rather than just saying, “Don’t touch that”, I need to explain why he cannot touch it. Scissors are sharp, they will cut you. The oven is hot, it will burn you. If you pull on that it may fall over and hurt your toes. It is possible that I could give all the appropriate explanations and he still will not listen until he experiences the results of his actions on his own. Afterall, cause and effect are still being learned and understood in the toddler years.