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* Do not start when a new baby is expected.

* Do not start when moving to a new home or even moving from the crib to a big bed.

* Do not start when traveling.

* Do not start when you or your child is sick.

* Do not start if certain family changes have occurred (separation, divorce, death, parental job changes or a stay-at-home parent going back to work).

Signs of Readiness

Children begin to show signs of readiness between the ages of 18 and 24 months. It is important to remember that every child is different and it’s been observed that boys usually start later and take longer to potty train than girls. Do not get discouraged if your child is not potty trained by his or her 3^rd birthday.  Although you may want to consult your pediatrician if this learning process seems to be taking longer than expected. There are several signs of readiness which fall into the areas of physical readiness, cognitive readiness, and behavioral readiness.

* Physical Signs of Potty Training Readiness

1.) your child can show or tell you when their diaper is wet or soiled

2.) your child can control their bladder muscles and hold urine for longer periods of time - please note, a child’s bladder (under 20 months or so) empties frequently and it’s very difficult to control or predict elimination times

3.) your child will keep his or her diaper dry for longer periods of time - 2 or more hours at a time during the day and occasionally wakes up dry after naps

4.) your child can get on and off the potty with little to no help

5.) your child can pull pants and underwear down and up with little to no help, also simple dressing skills are emerging

6.) your child urinates a good amount at one time

7.) your child has regular and somewhat predictable bowel movements

* Cognitive Signs of Potty Training Readiness

1.) your child understands concepts such as: wet/dry, clean/dirty, up/down, on/off

2.) your child is familiar with toilet words - pee, poop, bm, urinate, bottom

3.) your child can communicate needs and understands and follows simple directions

4.) your child understands the concept of putting things where they belong - pee-pee goes in the potty

5.) your child understands the signs that mean he or she has to go to the potty

* Behavioral Signs of Potty Training Readiness

1.) your child is aware of his or her bodily functions, your child lets you know that he/she is having a bowel movement (grunts or squats, hides in a corner or another room, has that certain “look”, or even announces that he/she is going or just went) - a child not ready to toilet train will ignore the poop in his or her pants or the urine flowing down his/her leg

2.) your child begins to show a new interest in neatness and cleanliness - they insist on being clean and dry, sticky fingers and face disrupts them, and they even become more interested in keeping their toys picked up

3.) your child is interested in wearing underpants instead of diapers

4.) your child is interested in the bathroom and shows curiosity in watching others use the toilet and with flushing the toilet

5.) your child’s attention increases and is able to sit on the potty for a length of 2-5 minutes in order to produce a urine flow or bowel movement

6.) your child demonstrates new found independence and takes pride in his or her accomplishments

7.) your child is not resistant to potty training or in the typical toddler “no” stage

What to do when you’ve determined your child is ready to potty train

Introduce toilet learning

Before jumping straight into hard-core potty training, you may want to take a couple of weeks or even months to begin introducing different aspects of toilet learning. You may want to start with placing a potty chair in the living area, or where your child spends most of his or her time at home. During this time, let your child explore and play with the potty chair. This will help him/her become more familiar with it and take some of the fear out of using the potty chair. Let your child sit on the seat, either fully clothed or if the child wants without any clothes or diaper on. Do not force your child to sit on it or to stay on the potty for any length of time. At this point, you want to follow your child’s cues and make a few suggestions about using the potty. After your child becomes a bit more comfortable and familiar with the potty, begin to show him or her how the potty is used. Place your child’s poop from a diaper into the potty chair and then take it to the bathroom and let your child watch you flush it down the toilet. This will help your child make the connection between dirty diapers and the potty and where the proper place for stool to go. Let your child flush the toilet and say “bye-bye” to the poops!

You may also want to allow your child to observe others using the bathroom. Let your child make visual connections in learning how the toilet works, the proper way to use toilet paper, and even how to wash your hands. If you have a boy, it is important to allow him to watch a male use the toilet also - again another connection being made!

You can also begin preparing your child for potty training by talking about it. Come up with child-friendly words to describe the process and then stick to those words to prevent confusion (“pee”, “poop”, “potty”, “bottom”). Begin asking your child if he or she is wet or had a bowel movement. If you notice your child giving you any signs of having a bowel movement (grunting, squatting, etc.), ask them if they are pooping and then change them immediately and flush the poop down the toilet.

Purchase the equipment & supplies

If you haven’t already done so, your child will need a potty chair. Once your child has become comfortable with using the potty chair, he or she may transition to using the over-the-toilet seat along with a step stool. You may want to have a potty chair or seat for each bathroom in your house or one on each floor of your home. You may also want to keep one in your car for emergencies or while traveling.

There seems to be a quiet debate among experts about whether or not to use disposable training pants. Some experts believe that children view them as diapers and confuses them on if it is okay to use them like diapers. They believe that the use of these may actually slow the process of toilet learning. However, others feel that these training pants are a useful step to transition a child from using diapers to underwear. Another benefit of training pants is that they let your child undress for the potty on their own. Often, children’s nighttime bladder and bowel control is slower than daytime control. Because of this, many parents chose to use these training pants at night and even when leaving the home. You may want to ask your pediatrician what her feelings are on disposable training pants or you can just experiment and see how your child reacts to them.

Whether or not you decide to use disposable training pants, your child will need big-boy or big-girl underwear. Some parents and experts say that these work better than disposable pants because the child can actually feel when he or she urinates or has a bowel movement in them.

Teach the language of potty training

As discussed a little earlier, it is important to teach your child the various potty words which will be used. It is also important to instruct other family members and caregivers on these chosen words. This will help to reduce any confusion the child may have when it comes to naming body parts and the different bodily functions.

Teach the proper steps to using the toiletIt is usually better to start boys in the sitting down position. It takes a lot more coordination to stand on a stool, aim, and hit the toilet than it does to just sit and relax and let nature take it’s course. This will also help eliminate any confusion between why you would stand up to pee, but you have to sit down to have a bowel movement.

Again, if your child poops in his or her diaper or underwear, take them into the bathroom and let them watch you flush it down the toilet. You may let your child flush the toilet themselves, too.

If you like, try a few potty training picture books, videos, or even a potty training doll. These can all assist your child in learning the steps involved in potty training.

As mentioned before, you may want to allow your child to watch you sit on the toilet. While doing this, explain to your child what you are doing. Give them a verbal description of each step from pulling pants down, sitting on the toilet, flushing the toilet, etc.

Set a routine to use the potty

You must set a schedule to putting your child on the potty, whether he/she has to go or not. You may want to start with regular intervals of every 1 to 2 hours. Do not force your child to sit on the potty, especially if he or she seems scared to do so. If this is the case, your child is simply not ready to start toilet training. If your child does go potty you will want to praise any accomplishment and do not show any signs of disappointment if your child does not go. The most important thing is to stay positive and be patient. Remember, your child is still learning.

Watch for signs of urination and bowel movements

You will want to become aware of your child’s particular signs that he or she is urinating or having a bowel movement. Whenever your child demonstrates these signs you will want to take them to the potty. Again, do not force them to sit on the potty. Just taking them to the potty or into the bathroom will encourage a connection between the function and the proper place to complete this function.

Dress your child properly to encourage independence while potty training

It is encouraged that you dress your child in loose and easily removable pants. As cute as frilly dresses and overalls are, potty training is not the time to dress your child in these. Think about it, you do not want your child’s nicest clothes ruined by accidents and your goal is to teach your child to independently complete the process of using the toilet. The simpler the clothes the better at this time.

Don’t forget about rewards and praise

Do not forget to praise your child upon successfully using the potty. Praise and reward every accomplishment, no matter how small. The more excited you become about your child’s success, the more excited and willing your child will be also. You may offer your child some small rewards or prizes every time your child goes in the potty. Stickers, a favorite activity, small candies (m&m’s work well) are all good reinforcers. You may want to keep track of successes and allow a bigger reward, like shopping for new underwear, when your child demonstrates a certain amount of success.

How to handle accidents and regression

Do not punish your child if he or she has an accident. If your child does have an accident, calmly clean it up and then remind your child that pee-pees or poop goes in the potty. Also, it is not uncommon for a previously toilet trained child to demonstrate some regression during times of stress or change. You, as the parent, will need to show patience and understanding during these times. If your toilet trained child has suddenly started having problems for no explainable reason, you may want to consult your pediatrician to rule out a possible infection. Don’t forget that any newly learned skill takes time to master completely, this is the same for potty training.

Night potty training

Night training could take several additional months to master completely. Even though your child may be completely trained during the day, your child is still too immature to wake up in the middle of the night to use the bathroom. To begin encouraging night training you should continue to put your child in a diaper or disposable training pant at bedtime. You should encourage your child to use the toilet right before bedtime and also encourage him or her to use the potty if they need to during the night. Make sure that your child knows it is okay to call for you if they wake up and need to go. Once your child has stayed dry for up to five consecutive nights it is okay to start serious nighttime training. You will want to prepare your child’s bed with a mattress protector or a plastic sheet under the cloth one. You may want to limit the amount of liquids your child takes in before bedtime and make sure that he or she goes to the toilet before putting him/her to bed. If your child is having accidents and seems to be getting discouraged, simply put them back into a diaper or disposable pant and try again in a few months.

Instruct other caregivers on how you are toilet training your child

It is important to let all caregivers (babysitters, daycare providers, and other family members) know how you are planning to toilet train your child. This can be a confusing and anxiety-filled time and your child needs consistency. This means consistency with terms to be used, methods, and rewards.

Ideas to encourage success in potty training

1.) Set a timer

Setting a timer encourages consistency. A timer does not only remind the child when to try to potty, but it also reminds the adult. We all know how minutes and hours can fly by when we get started with cooking dinner or doing laundry. Start with setting the timer for 30 minutes. You will probably notice that your child does not need to go this often and soon a routine will be clearly seen and established.

2.) Reward with stickers or small candies

Reward your child with one sticker or candy for attempting to use the potty, three stickers or candies for urinating in the potty, and five stickers or candies for having a bowel movement in the potty. Don’t forget to record these successes on a chart, too!

3.) Do a little science

Try dying the toilet water with some red or blue food coloring and then watch the magic happen the next time your child urinates in the potty - the water will change to orange or green. This is a great way for a parent to monitor progress and it teaches the child about colors and science as well!

4.) Shop

Let your child shop for his or her own underwear. After your child has demonstrated success with toilet training, take him/her shopping and let your child pick out their own favorite underwear.

Do’s and Don’ts of Potty Training

* Do switch from diapers to training pants when you and your child are ready.

* Do go bare-bottomed or dress your child in easily accessible clothing to allow independence and ease in toilet training.

* Do watch for signs of needing to go.

* Do watch the clock to establish a routine and to develop regular patterns of elimination.

* Do try a potty doll and have your child “teach” the doll to potty.

* Do turn the faucet on to encourage urination.

* Do praise success!

* Do motivate your child by calling him/her a “grown up” or a “big boy/girl”.

* Do reward your child.

* Do teach about dryness. Let your child check his/her underwear for dryness or wetness.

* Do be patient.

* Do teach hygiene.

* Do teach other caregivers on how you are approaching potty training.

* Don’t expect too much too soon and don’t make expectations too high.

* Don’t punish or shame your child if they have an accident.

* Don’t deny drinks to avoid accidents.

* Don’t give your child laxatives or suppositories to encourage or try to control bowel movements.

* Don’t nag you child. Toddlers do not like being told what to do, instead give them casual reminders to use the toilet.

* Don’t force your child.

* Don’t discuss your child’s progress or lack of progress in front of him or her.

* Don’t make the bathroom a battle ground. If your child is demonstrating total resistance then your child is simply not ready, back off a little but not completely. Try again in a few weeks.

I hope that all goes well! For more information, you may want to refer to your pediatrician. Also, I found the book What to Expect the Toddler Years to be quite helpful while I was toilet training my son.